Yesterday KB and I started back with her schooling. We mostly did reviews because it's been so long since we have done any schooling. Yes, we did a little here and there especially when momma was at the Dr or having her treatment. I feel our schooling will much better today. KB seemed to enjoy getting back into it or maybe it was all that one on one attention she got. Yesterday was the hardest I have had since momma passed away though. I was able to hold my crying in till Dan got home for I could go to my room and cry all by myself and let it out. I actually feel much better this morning. It's hard being the strong cookie trying to hold everybody else up, but at least I'm still able to have my moments to let it all out.
I feel like once I get us a schedule set up I should be able to blog and visit more. I think that will help a lot also because I sure have missed yall so much.
My brothers and I have got to make ourselves go and clean the rest of momma's house out this weekend. I think that will be a big part of our healing and help my little brother set the house up the way he wants it.
I hope to see yall soon! Take care and have a wonderful day!
Wednesday, January 20, 2010
Monday, January 18, 2010
Thank you everyone for your kind words, Love and support.
This week has been like a foggy whirlwind. It is finally starting to die down and reality is setting in. The good thing about all this is I don't have any regrets and my brothers and I coming together even closer if one could imagine that. We have always been close, but with us growing up and having our own families, we just didn't seem as close as we did when we lived at home. This week we have bonded together in a new bond, which is great in my book. I have seen other families fall apart and fight over a parent passing and I don't think I could have dealt with this week if we had all that going on. The hardest thing this week besides momma not being here is cleaning out her house. I'm glad we all are going to have little pieces of momma with us, but the house will never be the same. My youngest brother got the house and he said it was harder staying there without momma than he thought. I could not imagine I'm having a hard time just going over there. He said he was going to give it 6mths to see if it gets easier and if not he is going to more than likely sell it. If he does I will not blame him, but I doubt he will because he has lived in that house since he was 2.
We still have a few legal things to deal with and finish cleaning out mom’s house. After today, I’m going to start back schooling with the kids. That will help keep me busy and hopefully make things a little easier. Not only was she my mother she was my best friend. I’m holding together okay, but have found myself saying to the kids when they are picking on me, I’m going to tell my momma. I did that yesterday and my middle brother called as soon as I got it out of my mouth. What made it so weird is that he has momma’s phone and I have not changed it to his name in my phone. So, as soon as I said I’m going to call momma momma called my phone. It was one of those moments where my heart sank, but made me laugh at the same time.
I just want to thank everyone for sticking with me in the last 2 years and being such dear friends!
Hugs to everyone and hope you have a blessed day!
We still have a few legal things to deal with and finish cleaning out mom’s house. After today, I’m going to start back schooling with the kids. That will help keep me busy and hopefully make things a little easier. Not only was she my mother she was my best friend. I’m holding together okay, but have found myself saying to the kids when they are picking on me, I’m going to tell my momma. I did that yesterday and my middle brother called as soon as I got it out of my mouth. What made it so weird is that he has momma’s phone and I have not changed it to his name in my phone. So, as soon as I said I’m going to call momma momma called my phone. It was one of those moments where my heart sank, but made me laugh at the same time.
I just want to thank everyone for sticking with me in the last 2 years and being such dear friends!
Hugs to everyone and hope you have a blessed day!
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